Holby City: The good that comes from being in hospital

(Series 17, ep.37 ) It’s heartening to see that Henrik Hanssen hasn’t given up being enigmatic. This week he communicated some staffing advice to Elliot Hope via the medium of a children’s book about a gorilla, and a strategically presented banana. This was far more subtle than saying, “Prof. Hope, I really think you ought to be paying more attention to Dr Zosia March,” though being less subtle might have avoided Elliot having to spend so long pondering the meaning of the gift – time he could have spent paying more attention to Dr Zosia March.

Zosia had a deeply annoying patient and the patient’s even more annoying sister to deal with. They were convinced they were both afflicted by a fictional parasitic worm disease, and this was preventing the woman agreeing to treatment for a real heart problem. Dr Oliver Valentine – who is now Mr Oliver Valentine, if you please – wanted to take the direct approach, which was basically to bang heads together, and I was with him on that one. Anyway, what was needed was a Psych consult from new Psych guy Seb “Call me Seb” Coulter, who is going to be popping up everywhere now, just like when we had Psych Sharon. He’s an “arrogant narcissist” according to Zosia, and we must believe her because she’s read all the Psych text books. He also has a flashy little car which he drives wearing driving gloves to keep the smell of ciggies off his hands. Doesn’t that sound attractive? Zosia thinks so, anyway, and he’s asked her out, so she may get to find out even more about him. She was a bit worried that getting into an emotional entanglement could set her health back, but Dig and Dom delightfully reassured her that this wasn’t the case. She also got the fake parasite woman to admit that she’d been using the fake parasite illness as a bit of an emotional crutch (there was some kind of brains-speak going on there, but it was even more subtle than the gorilla book and the banana). Zosia is “the good that comes from being in hospital,” apparently.

Holby City: Everything must go

(Series 17, ep.27) This episode left me with a warm, fuzzy feeling – which is surprising considering that large swathes of screen-time were occupied by Selfie blustering around the hospital corridors.

The writers did their best to reposition him as a man of integrity who really just wanted to do what he does best – drill people’s skulls. The CEO life wasn’t really for him, he realised. He wanted to be there at the soggy end with his fingers in a brain. To add to the sympathy factor, his late wife was invoked (it’s hard doing something when the person who loved you doing it is no longer there, or words to that effect) and he seemed more than a tad affected by Jac’s sudden disappearance (taking her deferred maternity leave, it turns out). The lack of Jac also worried Ric, who was at Selfie’s shoulder at regular intervals looking concerned. “There’s a super-centre roaring down the highway with no one at the wheel,” Ric said, and I wasted too long in trying to picture what that would look like. 

Holby City: Jonny learns to live a little

(Series 17, ep.26) When Jonny Mac left the Wyvern County Jail with a friend he’d met inside, it was inevitable the friend (Archie) would end up being a patient on Darwin before the hour was out. He only had time to steal some drugs from the pharmacy, get bladdered and utter some life guidance to Jonny, before he was whisked away to theatre to die on the operating table with a heart turned into a soggy sponge by a lifetime of poor lifestyle choices. 

Holby City: Selfie fails to impress anyone

(Series 17, ep.25) Shall it be Holby or The Mythical St James’s for the Cardiothoracic Super-Centre? And doesn’t that question have a familiar ring about it? It seems like a CT contest between Holby and its mythical rival is almost an annual event.

The decision-making power this time seems to rest in the hands of one Dept of Health bigwig, Neil Maclin (unseen), and his wife Francesca – seen, because she had a cough that Elliot needed to sort out. Luckily (for Selfie) she also needed some spinal surgery, which gave him a chance to show off his fabulous surgical skills. It also gave Francesca the chance to observe his personality at close quarters. “I don’t like him either,” she confided to Elliot at the end of the episode, and she offered to make sure the Super-Centre went to St James’s just to spite him. Elliot convinced her that he’d rather like to have the Super-Centre all the same – so if Holby gets it, it will be despite, rather than because of, Selfie’s efforts. 

Holby City. Jonny be good

Sadly, due to sad family circumstances, Sue ‘Queen of Holby’ Haasler is unable to blog this week, so I’ll be providing a brief stand-in post for my lovely friend.

Look, I’ll admit. I watch Holby every week, and I’m a devoted fan of Sue’s blog, but I’m counting down the days until Henrik Hanssen is back in the captain’s chair on the bridge, or wherever the person in charge of this hospital keeps everything running smoothly. Selfie is a vain, inept twonk, and I don’t like it when there are staffing shortages and confusion over shift patterns, however fictional. Jonny can be irksome at times, but it’s preposterous that he should be on remand awaiting trail for murder. Great that it transpires at the end of the episode that Jac is paying for a high-class defence team for him (as well as supporting Elliott’s Kibo development. She must have a hell of a salary), but I’m not sure why he couldn’t get bail, neither do I understand why he has no memory of explaining how to change the battery of the ‘Kibo’ to the memory-deficient partner of the patient who died.

Holby City: The three unluckiest men in Holby

(Series 17, ep.21) This was the episode when Dr Harry Tressler-Posh finally realised that he was in love with the radiant Mary-Claire Carter, and decided to tell her. It was either that or watch her swan off into the Australian sunset with Helicopter Tom. Mary-Claire assured Harry that Australia was only a work arrangement and she and H-Tom weren’t an item. Anyway, “You’re the one who told me I deserved the best,” she reasoned. “Yes,” he reasoned back. “I meant me.” Bless him – modesty still intact even in the face of imminent heartbreak. Mind you, if he’d known how the day was going to turn out, he might have agreed to accept “imminent heartbreak” as a less painful alternative. 

Holby City: Measuring contests

(Series 17, ep.20) Why is Selfie doing chest compressions on a Darwin patient? Why does Jonny want to keep going with the resuscitation attempt even though it’s been 30 minutes already? Why do Elliot and Selfie think they should stop? Why does Jonny Mac start trashing stuff afterwards?

And… flashback to several hours earlier. Julie Kale is a patient without long to live (we know that already because we just saw her die) – and all that’s standing between her and the Grim Reaper at this point is Elliot and his shiny new, only ever tested on Oliver Valentine, Kibo device. Julie’s ready, her husband is ready (he has short-term memory issues following an accident – which will be important later), Elliot and the staff are ready – and Selfie is ready, because it’s another chance to show off the world-beatingness of Holby. 

Holby City: Excellent work, Nurse Carter

(Series 17, ep.19) In this episode, Mary-Claire faced everyone’s worst nightmare – trying not to laugh at a very poorly executed tattoo. But she’s a professional, and the tattoo was on her patient, so she didn’t laugh. James, the patient, thought she was laughing at one point, and fairly soon she was barricaded in a cupboard with him while he insisted that she removed the tattoo for him with only a sharp knife to help her. That’s how much he really hated that tattoo (which had a look of Michael Jackson crossed with Davina McCall on Camoxidan about it). 

Holby City: Don’t give your heart to just anybody

(Series 17, ep.17) The Darwin and AAU stories intertwined this week. Darwin contained a boy who was brain-dead and was therefore a potential organ donor. At the top of the list for a heart/lung transplant was another Holby person, so to keep the families separate as protocol demanded, the potential recipient had to stay on AAU. 

Holby City: The first day of the rest of Fletch’s life

(Series 17, ep.15) Since his transfer from Casualty, Fletch has been floating decoratively around AAU being funny, relatable, supportive – but without having anything very much to do apart from a bit of banter. This was fixed in dramatic style this week, as he was given what we might call an “emotional rollercoaster” of an episode to get his very nice teeth into.