Holby City: They tried to make her go to rehab

(Series 15, ep.2)  Eddi, Luc and the “love bus” were back at Holby this week, Eddi deeming herself ready to face the temptations of the AAU drugs cupboard with Luc’s support. If only Michael hadn’t given her the keys again, all might have been well. About five minutes into the shift she was already stuffing Camoxidan down her face like it was about to be made prescription-only. Oh.

What had been kept secret from the Holby-watching world was that this was Sarah-Jane Potts’ last episode and all this Camoxidan business has been her exit storyline.  Suitably dramatic it was,too, with Eddi at last finding true love again with Luc, only to collapse on the floor of the basement (nothing good ever happens in that basement) after taking erratic doses of her favourite medication. Luc had to take drastic action. When Eddi woke up, she found herself surrounded by Luc, Michael Spence, Sacha and her brother Liam, all gazing at her more in sorrow than in anger. Seeing Liam was the jolt she needed. She didn’t want to end up like their mum, so she decided getting away from Holby was the only way to do it.  So farewell Eddi McKee, one-time Best Nurse in the Hospital and Face Puller Extraordinaire. Who will we be able to rely on now for those all-important end-of-scene reaction shots?  

Holby City: The come down

(Series 15, ep.1)  The sad truth for the intoxicated is that you either have to take more of whatever got you high to keep you there, or you have to face the come down afterwards.

This is very much how I felt watching this week’s Holby. Not that the series opener (I love how a new series starts a mere seven days after the old one ended) wasn’t a perfectly serviceable piece of telly, because it was. In parts it was actually pretty good. It just didn’t stand up so well compared to last week‘s near-perfection.

Last week’s episode had one writer (Justin Young) and this week there were three people listed on the credits (Martha Hillier, Dana Fainaru and Julia Gilbert). There were also three story lines, and I wonder whether they were given one each.  If they were, the person who got the Eddi and Luc storyline fared the best. For her own good, Eddi had been ring-fenced, like John Stape ring-fenced Rosie Webster in Corrie. Luc had driven her in the camper van to the grounds of an unspecified stately home he’s allowed to camp in and planned to keep her there until all the nasty camoxidan was out of her system.  

Holby City: All you need is love. And Camoxidan

(Series 14, ep.52) An entire episode dealing with Chrissie’s inner turmoil as to whether to marry Sacha or not does not sound like the stuff televisual dreams are made of. I mean, for one thing – duh! He might be built more for comfort than speed, but Sacha is officially The Nicest Man in the World, so why wouldn’t you want to marry him? Particularly when you’ve sampled more or less everyone else. But it was actually one of the best episodes of Holby I’ve ever seen.

It took place across the five days leading up to The Happy Occasion. On Monday, the betrothed pair were planning to keep the wedding quiet and Chrissie was looking about as excited as if she was going for a colonoscopy. Meanwhile, Michael Spence was worried about letting Eddi have the keys to the drugs cupboard, what with her involvement with Wolfie and his druggy behaviour, and told her she’d only be able to do this if she got them signed off by another doctor (ie Luc) first. The only way Eddi could cope with all this suspicion was with liberal doses of Camoxidan.

By Tuesday, Eddi was getting numb hands. This is what Camoxidan abuse does, as we saw from Wolfie. It was also making her stroppier than usual and making her shout at Billy Corkhill from Brookside, whose wife was in a coma. “Eddi is a great nurse, but she’s a little feisty,” Sacha apologised. Eddi’s Camoxidan supply ran out. The quiet wedding was turning into a slightly larger affair when Sacha’s daughters got wind of it and proceeded to cry and sulk because they hadn’t been invited. “They forced it out of me,” Sacha apologised again. Only to Chrissie this time, rather than Billy Corkhill.

On Wednesday, love was in the air, as Oli and Tara arrived at the hospital holding hands. I can’t help thinking of them as “the Valentines” already. Meanwhile, Chrissie was arriving at the hospital in a hot car with a bunch of Sacha’s relatives. (By coincidence, Sacha’s mum is also the mum of Jackie in Friday Night Dinner). Chrissie was having major doubts. “Am I making a terrible mistake?” she fretted in the general direction of Malick. This is Malick who was party to her terrible mistake with Dan Hamilton, don’t forget. On Darwin, Jac had found a use for Tara, when a Chinese patient needed a translator. Only the patient spoke Cantonese and Tara only speaks Mandarin, so she had to ring her mum for a translation. Plus she was in an even bigger fluster than usual because Oli had casually let slip that he loves her (all together now: Squeeeeeeee!!!).

Thursday, AKA Wedding Eve, AKA Last Day of Freedom, depending on your viewpoint. If Chrissie thought she was going to slip quietly into wedded bliss, Chantelle had other plans as she’d arranged a hen party, complete with pink fluffy L plates for Chrissie. I think she passed that particular test some time ago. Marvellously, Sacha’s stag do took place in Luc’s camper van, and even more marvellously the only guests were Michael Spence, Luc – and Jac Naylor. It was perfect that Jac was there, because she’s far more at home with the stags than the hens and her friendship with Sacha is a precious and lovely thing. It’s also lovely to see Jac really smiling and looking relaxed and happy. Not that she wasn’t her usual sarcastic self, though. Sacha was telling them about the night he met Chrissie. “By the end of the night we had conceived Daniel,” he sighed, and everyone looked slightly queasy. Sacha didn’t notice, because he was radiantly happy. “I wish you could all have what I have,” he said. Jac didn’t miss a beat. “In fairness, most of the hospital’s had what you have,” she said. As Jac was leaving, she bumped into Chrissie, who may or may not have been on her way to tell Sacha she was having second thoughts. Any nonsense of that sort was swiftly banished by Jac, who reminded Chrissie in no uncertain terms that Sacha is officially The Nicest Man in the World and not to go breaking his heart – or else.

In other news on the Thursday, Eddi was busy switching Tara’s Chinese patient’s medication – giving the patient aspirin, so she could grab a couple of those precious Camoxidan tablets. Oh, Eddi.

And at last, The Big Day. Thanks to some last-minute work by Chrissie and the female Levis, the wedding took place in the restaurant where Sacha and Chrissie had their first date. Only a stone’s throw from the hospital as well. It was a magical occasion, with the groom looking like he couldn’t believe his luck, the bride looking happy (albeit in a not entirely convinced way), Jac looking sceptical and Eddi off her box on Camoxidan. Mo and Jonny Mac turned up – in fact most of the cast were there at some point, though I was a little disappointed that Mark “Jesus” Williams didn’t show up, because it’s always handy to have “Jesus” at a wedding party in case the wine runs out. Eddi made a bit of a show of herself and had to be taken back to the camper van by Luc to sleep it off, and Tara said something to Oli in Chinese which was probably that she loves him, too. Because that’s what people do at weddings. They get romantic, or sentimental, or hammered. Or they just do a spot of dad-dancing, like Jonny Mac.

Next time: OMG! It’s Series 15!

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Holby City: Is this something else that might require a doughnut?

(Series 14, ep.50)  The main action this week was in AAU and Keller, with Darwin as this week’s comedy relief. I never thought I’d hear myself say that.

To the hurly burly of AAU first, and the hot news is that Luc’s camper van was clamped. The other hot news was that Wolfie had the chance of a nice job in Brighton – now Luc’s back, there’s no job for Wolfie at Holby. This was just as well, because Luc was noticing some troubling things about Wolfie. For one thing, he’s hardly ever seen without having Nurse McKee attached to his face, which has got to be awkward and inconvenient, not least for the patients. For another thing, he had trembly hands. Again, not something to inspire patient confidence, and also a tell-tale sign of Camoxidan addiction. Luc did what any self-respecting maverick doctor would do, and covertly took a sample of Wolfie’s hair – or should we call it pelt – from his jacket while Wolfie wasn’t wearing it, and had it tested. This is not technically legal, but who cares when it came up with the evidence that Wolfie has been full of Camoxidan for at least months. This explains the trembly hands and the fact that he can’t put a pressure bandage on to save his life. Or, more accurately, to save someone else’s life.

There was a big showdown, Wolfie stomped off to Brighton and Eddi failed to stomp with him – but she did try to cheer herself up after his departure by popping one of his dodgy pills herself. Are we now going to have to endure Eddi’s descent into drugs hell? I had enough of that when it was Mark “Jesus” Williams who at one stage was forever nipping off to the gents for a mid-shift enlivener.  

Holby City: “I don’t do slack”

(Series 14, ep.49)  Where to start with last night’s Holby episode? It was Chrissie’s 40th birthday (but don’t make a fuss because she still wants to be showbiz 30-something), but that was the least exciting thing that was going on. Cake, crisps and a signed card might be thrilling enough for Chantelle (“You’ve just described hell,” muttered Chrissie), but we were busy being treated to the return of Luc, a radiation scare, lust and romance all over the place, ninja level surgery and Mo and Jac naked (but only because the part demanded it).

It opened with a pair of awkward threesomes. Who should happen to walk in on Eddi and Wolfie having one of their hair-ruffling encounters but Dr Luc Hemingway, sporting a new super-short haircut (no hair ruffling for him). Not even a gentle roar of a camper van engine to warn Eddi that her former beau was back, either. And who should walk in on Jac and Jonny having a quick snog in the lift than Young Dr Oliver Valentine, who could accurately be described as a former squeeze of the lovely Miss Naylor himself. As PLA Jr would say, “Awkward turtle.”  

Holby City: Bad moon rising

(Series 14, ep.48) There was a moment in an episode a couple of weeks ago, which was repeated in the recap at the start of this episode, when Eddi was feeling a bit deflated and Wolfie said he had “something that would make her feel better.”

“Aha!” I remember thinking at the time. “He’s on drugs! That’s why he keeps going for extended fag breaks.” Only then he and Eddi went off for some store room shenanigans, and I thought I’d got it wrong. But I hadn’t, had I? This week saw him scrabbling round among used needles and bloody swabs (ugh) for some precious Camoxidan tablets that had almost got thrown away. He ended up high as a kite with a scalpel in his hand, trying to perform surgery while Eddi tried to convince him to step away from the table because he was clearly not quite right, and a surgical team of non-speaking extras looked concerned and/or amused. That Camoxidan looks like good stuff, but don’t try getting it either from Boots or from that dodgy bloke at the pub, because it’s completely fictional. But did nobody notice how bizarre Wolfie’s behaviour was getting? He did everything apart from swish his cape, twirl his moustache and cackle manically to signal he was Turning To The Dark Side.

Holby City: Michael Spence. Hell, yeah

(Series 14, ep.46)  Little pen-pushing, calculator-prodding George Binns has been in need of a bit of lesson-learning. You know, the kind of lesson where patients cease to be statistics and you find yourself with your face shoved up against the grim reality of death.

Trust Michael Spence to take that quite literally. If I’d had a tiny American flag to hand, I’d have waved it merrily at the end of this episode, when our favourite tight-trousered surgeon decided he’d had enough nonsense from Little George Binns for one lifetime and frogmarched him through the hospital to show him exactly what the non-referral policy had meant in terms of human suffering, as embodied by guest artiste David Troughton, a nice man who ended up dying despite Michael’s best efforts to find him a bed. George had been getting rather above himself (not difficult, as he’s only about five feet tall) during the episode. When Michael started to leave a pointless managerial seminar early, Little George had a bit of an edge to him when he said, “I wouldn’t miss it… if I were you.” It was only a matter of time before someone punched him. The thought did cross my mind, “Where’s Joseph Byrne when you need him?” but I think that most weeks anyway. As it turned out, Michael rose to the occasion magnificently. I do love Michael when he’s full of righteous indignation.