In the continuing bid for high drama before the credits, Sookie staked Lorena, causing a great tsunami of blood to go geysering up to the ceiling before coming down splat! on top of poor old Bill who was shackled underneath. I’ve high-fived the props department before (‘thirty vats more ketchup over here!’) but they surpassed themselves with the amazing red gloop that once was Lorena. Can’t say I was sorry to see her go. I imagine almost all that red gloop was her lipstick.
We galloped into this episode with the same thundering pace of last week: Sookie and Tara teaming up telepathically to overpower the wildly irritating Debbie, Alcide putting a silver bullet in the horrible Cooder, and everyone dragging Bill into Alcide’s van and tearing off across the manicured lawn, running over a werewolf or two en route. Blimey, I said, and not for the last time, as I steadied my nerves with a slug of Babysham. Phew, I added, as Alcide and Tara had a sensible conversation and Sookie cut her arm with a hacksaw to revive Bill, as you do. All back to normal I see. Sookie cutting herself with a hacksaw constitutes a calm interlude round these parts. But Bill went bonkers and drained Sookie dry, and when Tara opened the back of the van and saw what he gone done, she threw him into the blazing sunlight and got Sookie pronto to the hospital where she was at death’s door because she is just plain weird and doesn’t have a blood type. If I was smart this would doubtless tell me something about what Sookie is but as I’m not I’ll just stick to ‘plain weird’ as my verdict for now.