Tag Archives: Charles Dance

Game Of Thrones: Tywin up loose ends…

Season 4 Episode 10

WARNING: Contains SPOILERS for the most recent Game Of Thrones episode

The shit was all hitting the fan  (and the floor in Tywin Lannister’s case) in this season’s final visit to the eternally uplifting Westeros. In a melee of blood and guts, Game Of Thrones outdid its previous standards with the quantity of central character demises in a single episode, particularly those who were excreting moments earlier.

The most prominent development (I say prominent, but the build up was sadly lacking, with only the closing scenes of the episode giving any focus to it) was Tyrion’s sudden escape from his prison cell courtesy of Jaime Lannister, who always goes above and beyond (and below) for his siblings. Tyrion had the option of slipping away quietly but instead sought a showdown with his father first. Tywin was occupied with a lengthy stool on the toilet (we’ve all been there, bless him) but his bedroom was not empty. Tyrion’s heart was ripped asunder as Shae turned over, muttering Tywin’s name while she lay in his bed.   Continue reading

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Game Of Thrones: If there’s any justice in the world…

Season 4 Episode 6. Warning: This article contains spoilers for screened episodes which some readers may wish to avoid. 

Justice (or the sheer lack of it) was a hot topic in the most recent visit to Westeros. While Danaerys was discovering that dealing with the aftermath of her bold actions was harder than anticipated, Tyrion faced the sham of the century in the form of a devastatingly unbalanced trial.

Of course, we knew from the outset that, with Cersei working behind the scenes to avenge the death of King Justin tyrion trialBeiber, there was no way that Tyrion was going to get a fair hearing.

Still, as proceedings commenced, everyone’s favourite whore-mongering dwarf did his aloof best to remain impassive to the injustice. As witness after witness took the stand to condemn him, a knowing but bitter smile remained on his lips as he saw the trial playing out exactly as he thought it was going to.   Continue reading

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Game Of Thrones: Tasteless twists and token titillations

WARNING: This post contains SPOILERS from recent episodes which some may prefer to avoid. And some may send me hate mail as they haven’t had time to watch it yet and I should have waited. 

For an episode containing incestuous rape beside the corpse of the couple’s murdered child inside of a church, a drawn out bisexual orgy, a man getting an arrow through the eye socket whilst talking enthusiastically about the standards of his wife’s potatoes and a competition in the desert over who can urinate at will for the longest, this week’s entry in the Game Of Thrones saga was disappointingly dull.game-of-thrones-ratings-season-4-episode-3

We picked up exactly where we left off, a refreshingly enjoyable sight of Joffrey’s purpling, bleeding and vomit splattered face drawing us nicely into the setting. Tyrion was promptly thrown back into his own personal cell in the dungeons whilst Sansa boarded a canoe, in the thick fog with a sinister stranger, without too much panic.

She was taken to Littlefinger’s own personal ghost ship somewhere in the middle of the ocean and, in a hugely shock twist, it turned out that he was actually up to no good. Instead of offering payment to the captor, he gave him a bolt in the chest.   Continue reading

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Game Of Thrones: Ding, dong, the king is dead.

Another day, another Westeros wedding ending in fatality.  In an episode  that opened with a young girl being chased and torn apart alive by dogs, one would think things couldn’t get any darker. And you would be right: the death of King Joffrey is an event to be celebrated by all, except perhaps Tyrion, who now looks set to face punishment for the murder of his nephew regardless of whether or not he is responsible.Joffrey

The focus was heavily on ‘The Purple Wedding’, another opportunity for Joffrey to grab the centre of attention and humiliate all of those around him. Tyrion was his main target for cruelty, with an uncomfortable slapstick performance from an acting group of dwarves leaving even Tywin looking abashed.  In sharp contrast to the sadness played out on Tyrion’s face by the fantastically versatile Peter Dinklage, Joffrey was having a whale of a time, seeming happier than he has been, well, ever. His last laugh was imminent though, as he sunk down the contents of a poisoned chalice and collapsed to the ground in a macabre demise.

His last bout of energy caused him to point the finger of blame at Tyrion, who was promptly seized and led away for murder.   Continue reading

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Game Of Thrones: Underhand and golden hand

(Season 4, ep.1) It’s been a while since a television announcer warned me that there will be graphic adult themes from the outset (well that’s my story and I’m sticking to it) but it can mean only one thing: the television fantasy/action/thriller/porn series that has gripped a feverish world has made its return at last – and it was largely triumphant. Stand alone, it made a fine piece of television; against the impossibly high standards that a popular series inevitably sets itself, it fell just short.game of thrones

The episode did a highly decent job of cramming the ridiculously large cast of characters into the episode so that each person’s favourite got their fair share of airtime, if only just to give tantalising scenes to their stories.

Any episode that opens with the brilliant Charles Dance (aka Christopher Lee’s long lost son) glaring into the screen gets my attention straight away and we saw him disown his one-handed son, after giving him a lovely fatherly gift of a new sword. Jaime/Young Harrison Ford/Prince Charming from Shrek 2 was not interested in taking his rightful place at the helm of Casterley Rock however, instead opting to focus on reigniting his incestuous affair with his charming sister Cersei. Cersei wasn’t really in the mood for sexual sibling shenanigans, as it transpired she was still a little peed off that Jaime got himself captured.   Continue reading

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Game of Thrones: Season 2 trailer!

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Game of Thrones: You should get some sleep. It’s going to be a long war

(Series 1, Ep.10) So that’s Game of Thrones over for a while. Like the book, it ended (literally) in a blaze of glory. Also, like the book, it left you wanting more. Rather than tying up loose ends and resolving plot issues, the ending of this particular story leaves everything in a state of flux, so you’re still desperate to know what happens next.

The episode began with the aftershocks of Ned’s death – yes, he really is dead, and his head is on a stick on the castle wall just in case we were in any doubt. A travelling troubadour who made up an amusing song about it, incorporating some witty lyrics about King Joffrey’s parentage, soon discovered that Joffrey is a far harsher judge than Simon Cowell when he was given a choice of losing his fingers or his tongue. Of course, Joffrey didn’t carry out the punishment himself. Joffrey likes to keep his hands clean, and this also applies to getting other people to give his girlfriend a slap when she gets out of hand.

Luckily a bit of sanity is on its way to Kings Landing in the form of Tyrion, whom Tywin has appointed King’s Hand. Tyrion is rebelling and taking his girlfriend, Shae, which is strictly against his father’s orders, what with Shae being a whore and so on. “Everyone, everywhere, always has to do exactly what my father says,” moaned Tyrion. “He’s always been a c**t.”

In the north, meanwhile, Robb Stark has been annointed “King of the North,” and is going into battle against the combined Lannister armies of Joffrey and his uncles Stannis and Renly, who all have a claim to be King on the Iron Throne.

Jon Snow and his comrades in the Night’s Watch are ignoring all this civil war business and are heading north, to look for Benjen Stark and find out exactly why spooks and undead types are getting restless.

Oblivious to all of this, Daenerys has had traumas of her own, with the death of her unborn child and her sun-and-stars Khal Drogo left in a persistent vegetative state. We’ve seen over the weeks that Daenerys is made of strong stuff, and she wasn’t about to let her proud warrior husband eke out his days in that manner, so she smothered him with a cushion and had a funeral pyre built, to which she added the double-crossing mystic Mirri Maz Duur and the dragon eggs. Then she walked into the flames herself.

In the morning, when the faithful Ser Jorah and Rakharo went to the site of the fire, they were met by an enduring image. Daenerys, naked, slightly singed-looking – and nursing three baby dragons.

Look out, Westeros – the Targaryens have got their dragons back.

Posted by PLA          (more Game of Thrones here, and if you want to know what happens next you’ll have to wait till next year or read the book)

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