I had high hopes for Corrie making a bit of a turnaround during the trial scenes recently, but it’s fair to say that that week of decent drama was a one off. Coronation Street really is all over the place at the moment and the critical wedding scenes and climax of Tina’s murder story, which could have been so much more, have proven to be a turn off.
So where are we up to in the world of Weatherfield? Rob and Carla’s stag night truth or dare sesh provided the juicy titbit that it was in fact Rob who bludgeoned Tina to death. Rob thought they were just having a night of the souls but, unlike when Tony Gordon confessed to her that he killed Liam (why do murderers confess their deepest crimes to Carla on a whim? She should work for the CIA), there was no way that Carla could keep this to herself. Peter, her cheating, alcoholic, temperamental ex, is lounging behind bars with big Jim McDonald and the dullest possible cellmate for company, accused of the crime that her brother did in fact commit. All credit to Alison King; she performed well in these confession scenes as always and provided a much needed reprieve from the pantomime that was the rest of the week’s scenes.
She allowed an edgy Rob to make it all the way up the aisle before a short conversation with Ken made her decide that she couldn’t chink champagne glasses with two married murderers and decided she would tell Tracy the truth. Not wanting to stick around for the horrendous acting that was to ensue, Rob bolted off, leaping over fences like Jai from Emmerdale and pursued by no one. Tracy screeched and half heartedly tried to push Carla over so that she scuffed her knee lightly while the rest of the congregation seemed mildly interested that a murder had just been revealed at a wedding.
In amongst this high octane drama and Ken’s badly concealed delight that his daughter’s misery could provide his son’s freedom, Tracy was arrested and taken away for questioning; as nailing her for perverting the course of justice was a far more pressing matter than apprehending an on the run killer. Meanwhile, the reactions to the revelations back on the Street were practically non existent. Eva made a very fleeting reference to her short lived relationship with Rob and David mentioned the situation of the one time love of his life being killed in passing whilst he googled Les Dennis’ heart condition. The payoff from the Street’s biggest storyline has also been the Street’s biggest letdown. Even Norris was more interested in a mystery package he’s due to receive, the contents of which is the only thing keeping me tuned in to Corrie at the minute.
Rob is now holed up in a B and B which doesn’t watch the news or read the papers with a ‘hysterical’ owner who keeps making Rob think the game is up with ‘hilariously’ misconstrued comments. As Corrie on the run folk always do, Rob’s next step was to use one of the few remaining phone boxes left in existence to phone a relative for money and Tracy was there in a shot, spending about thirty seconds shouting at him for ruining their lives and the rest of the time cracking jokes about how their honeymoon had turned out.
In other uplifting developments, two of Corrie’s comedy characters were suffering with crippling health conditions as Steve continued to battle with depression, much to the irritation of impatient lover Michelle and the ever so toned down Cilla revealed that she was suffering from osteoporosis. Fiz has now been elevated to the new Cilla; a gobby, loud, panto like character while Cilla is blending in nicely, building up particular rapports with Beth and the lovely Sinead. Despite her best efforts, Foghorn Fiz and Mardy Ches were in no forgiving mood until Sinead finally put them right and let them in on their mum’s health woes.
Elsewhere, Audrey suddenly is too nervous to drive and Kevin is only too happy to let his mechanic Luke take regular breaks from work to give Audrey free taxi rides. They then extended this fantastic, yet not very profitable, service to Maria, who wanted a new car with cupholders. Luke and Maria were forced into a horrendously contrived situation where a person suffering a diabetic attack was treated as comedy fodder to create strained banter to what I assume is Corrie’s next biggest romance.
Honestly, what a sheer mess. If all we have to look forward to is the non existent chemistry of Maria and yet another hunk with no substance and Tracy wailing for several weeks, then the immediate future isn’t looking bright for Corrie. Even releasing a supposedly dramatic trailer which has given away all of the plot twists right up to past Christmas isn’t going to turn this around. Perhaps the recently revealed story due to hit our screens in January might give a much needed clear out of the deadwood but my hopes aren’t high.
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Written By Our Man In The North