(Series 13, Ep.39) We picked up where we left off last week, with Malick having just punched Dull Dan. And bravo to the makeup department for making Dan’s nose look particularly gory and horrible. Gushing blood like the proverbial stuck pig, Dan staggered down several corridors leaving a messy trail behind him. He wasn’t bothered about hygiene or the poor person who’d have to clean up after him. He was mainly bothered about what Chrissie would say when she saw him all busted up, and how he would explain it, without mentioning the “I kissed a boy and I liked it” bit. What Malick didn’t want was to be sacked from yet another job for punching yet another consultant.
Dan’s first attempt at an explanation went along the lines of, “I got in the middle of a fight between a father and a son.” Chrissie is no fool, and she knew that wasn’t true, otherwise it would have been the talk of the hospital coffee bar and Dan would be filling out incident report forms in triplicate. She also spotted that Dan was acting very weirdly around Malick – though he’s been doing that for about a month now without her noticing anything. “It was Malick, wasn’t it?” she said, and Dan fell to his knees sobbing, “It’s always been Malick! He has something you can’t give me, Chrissie!” Actually no, he didn’t say that. What he said was that he’d tried to hit Malick first, and missed.
For reasons best known to herself, Chrissie marched off to Hanssen with this information, and he in return produced possibly the finest loom of his entire career so far when he materialised in a corridor to summon Dan to a meeting in his office at four o’clock. Never have the words “four” and “o’clock” sounded so ominous. So four o’clock was Dan’s High Noon, and he took Malick along too, so they could both pretend they knew nothing and hadn’t done anything and were both somewhere else when Dan fell and hit his face on a… thing. Hanssen’s even less of a fool than Chrissie, but what can you do when people close rank?
Chrissie was still dissatisfied with Dan’s explanations, so he said he’d been winding Malick up with some homophobic comments. This was plausible, because he’s said a few unsavoury things in the past. Chrissie accepted it and let him off with A Look of Grave Disappointment, and they left the hospital arm-in-arm, leaving Malick pondering them from the Window of Regret.
Meanwhile, Michael Spence and Plastic Bhatti argued over who should be the Face of Plasticity in their shiny new brochure. Plastic Bhatti thinks it should be him, because people are willing to pay a premium for a bit of Bhatti magic, and he’s terribly photogenic (he thinks). Michael had to do some reconstructive surgery on a girl who also had a heart problem. Miss Naylor being unavailable (boo!), Sahira Shah the Registrah was bleeped over, and she advised a postponement of the surgery, on the sensible grounds that the patient might die. When it all went tits-up (quite literally), Plastic Bhatti kind of saved the day with a spot of advice, but it was really Sahira and her proper medical skills that were impressing Michael. I’m thinking just give him a few weeks and we’ll be able to woo him away from plastics, no problem.
Sacha appeared to be moving on emotionally this week. He removed Chrissie from a photo of her and Daniel that was in his locker, so it looks like he’s given up all hope there. Then he went all flirtatious with an elderly patient’s daughter. Well, flirtatious Sacha-style, which is only one step up the socially awkward yet sweet ladder from Elliott Hope. It was all going wonderfully, until he had to talk to the woman about her father’s medical problem. As a side-effect of his medication, he (the old man, not Sacha) had a permanent and painful erection. She was far too grown-up to stick her fingers in her ears and shout “Blah blah blah!” but you could tell she wanted to, rather than hearing that her old man was having trouble with his old man. That, and the arrival of her husband, spelled the end of Sacha’s ambitions in the romance department. Eddi did warn him.
Next time: Jac and Sahira lock horns; Malick has to prove himself to Hanssen; and Sacha has to make a choice.
Posted by PLA (more Holby City here)