Daily Archives: July 23, 2010

Burn Notice (2.8): In which Fi gets a boyfriend with his own ambulance

Things get a bit tense and dark this week. The hunt for Bill Johnson (another of Carla’s reluctant little helpers) goes on, with much rummaging through trash cans (and the ruining of Sam’s khakis), but more worrying is Larry – a ‘dead’ ex-spy and psycho who wants Michael to assassinate a cancer-care nurse. Nice. Not. Michael takes the job purely so he can nix it. A plan that’s made a little harder by Larry’s promise that if the police come within a mile of the job, he will kill Everybody.

To prevent Jeannie becoming a ‘dead-ee’, Michael has to peel Fi away from her new “brilliant, adorable, paramedic” boyfriend Campbell and get her help finding out who wants Jeannie dead. It turns out to be Drew (Entitled Punk), her rich and comatose husband’s son from his first marriage, pissed off that she’s been written into the will. And to complicate things further Drew has hired two other guys (including his coke dealer) to kill Jeannie too.

Michael goes to considerable lengths to get the job called off, only for Larry to take matters into his own hands. Some slick moves from the team get us to the happy-ish ending, and leave time for Michael to put pieces of the Carla jigsaw together. It’s not looking like a pretty picture.

Reasons to love this episode:

  • The ladies’ room scene with Michael explaining the situation to Jeannie. He can wrap himself round me like that anytime he likes and I promise not to scream…
  • Sam getting hold of Bill Johnson’s military file by sharing some ‘Sam time’ with his buddy: “Hey not all my buddies are guys.”
  • Sam casually counting on his fingers the number of people Larry wants to kill when he learns the job is double-booked.
  • Michael being completely bad-ass with Drew.
  • Madelaine coming up with a cover ID so Michael can get into Bill Johnson’s rented room.
  • The idea that the ‘little pads on the pet’s paws just sucks up [the toxic liquid] like a straw…” and that the vet will take care of the owner too.
  • Michael using a flat-bed truck to stop a dump truck running head-on into the car containing Jeannie and Fi. That really looked like it hurt…
  • Fi on spotting Larry on his way to kill Jeannie: “He’s good. Came out of nowhere. Good-looking too.” Sam: “Yeah, he’s alright I guess. He’s no Campbell though.” Fi: “Who is?”. How Bruce Campbell kept a straight face through that exchange I will never know.

New spy stuff:

  • Laundry bluing is a easy way to blot out secrets and works like a dye pack – staining the skin of people digging through your trash (unless like our Mike and Sam, you wear vinyl gloves, of course).
  • Whatever vehicle you’re trying to take out there are three areas of vulnerability: the driver, the engine and the tyres. A can of paint across the windscreen could blind the driver and a 50mm cannon could kill the engine, but  neither will guarantee the vehicle won’t swerve into oncoming traffic. But if you force the front tyres off the road you drastically reduce the vehicle’s manouevrability.

Posted by Jo the Hat


Filed under Burn Notice

Lustbox: Alastair Campbell

I’ve thought Alastair Campbell to be pretty darn sexy for quite some years, but have been reluctant to blog about it. This is because, from what I’ve seen (and I met him briefly because I know someone who worked with him) he has a pretty high opinion of himself. Plus his partner, Fiona Millar, is a mighty fine woman, and I can’t imagine he is the easiest man to live with, so the last thing I wanted to do was contribute to the monstrous ego of her other half.

But fanciable he definitely is, even if he knows it. I like his tallness. The fact that he used to write porn is amusing. And I know for a fact that far from being a monster to work with, he’s actually a witty man, warm too. He’s almost certainly too sharp for his own good, but I’ve always liked brains in men. His taste in women is impeccable, and his Sky News wind-up of Adam Boulton was one of my favourite moments of the election.

But I feel the need to speak out now after spotting him on Top Gear and with Fern Britton at 5 recently. On both occasions he was trying to play the nice guy in the face of irksome Jeremy Clarkson being rude and the rather strange sight of Fern trying to be tough. Campbell may well be much nicer bloke than his scary reputation would indicate, but it’s not something that anyone who doesn’t know him would ever believe. Or want to, frankly. As Qwerty demonstrated so nicely, it isn’t something that makes him less attractive. So this is a plea to him to stop with the chummy nonsense. We don’t want to see that. We want to pretend you’re a mustachioed pantomime villain, a sweary, shouty Malcolm Tucker-esque monster of control-freakery. It’s much more fun.

Posted by Inkface


Filed under Lustbox