The world’s most beautiful heart surgeon, Joseph Byrne, has still not had a shave, and his OCD is getting the better of him as well (the old obsessive hand-washing when not actually about to perform surgery). You sense he won’t relax (as far as Joseph ever does “relax”) until he’s got to the bottom of who was responsible for Archie’s death. The irony is that he has got to the bottom of it – it was Nurse Lauren Minster mixing up the drug labels. But having come so close to getting Lauren to crack and admit it, Joseph has now been persuaded to back off in case she makes a career-ruining complaint against him for harassment.
As well as all this detective stuff, he managed to fit in an impressive bit of surgery this week, performing an open heart operation on a woman while she was still awake. This woman had balls of steel – not only was she awake, but she could see what was going on in her opened-up chest reflected in one of the lights.
While all this was going on, The Stunningly Beautiful Dr Penny Valentine was doing a little stint on AAU, just in time to see her favourite patient, the firefighter awaiting the heart transplant, being admitted. Dr Penny is more than a bit in love with this man and she got into big bother with Matron for procuring a sandwich for him. Sandwiches aren’t allowed on AAU, for some reason.
There was some nonsense involving a patient with a robotic camera which he managed to steer remotely into an operating theatre without anyone noticing. Given that this thing was about the size of the box I take our cat to the vet in, I found this a little implausible. Snake-hipped Dr Michael Spence had robots very much on his mind, though. A few weeks ago, Connie Beauchamp became Director of Robotics, but since then she’s been on gardening leave, and the robot has remained idle and covered in a dust sheet. It seems that in the NHS the phrase “use it or lose it” applies, and the hunt was on for a robot-qualified person to come and do a spot of kidney surgery. Sadly the man chosen wasn’t quite up to speed on the thoroughly modern model that Holby has, so it looks as though the robot will be making its way to rival hospital St James’. Connie will be absolutely livid when she gets back (if she gets back. Connie is coming back, isn’t she? Please tell me she is). And a livid Connie could reduce Malcolm Tucker to a small heap sobbing for his mummy and his blanky.
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