During my long and lurid ninja training I learned a thing or two about the way of the assassin, and on last night’s evidence I’d have to say that Jimmy Dockerson falls woefully short.
FYI, James, if you’re planning to “do someone in,” don’t be going parking your car outside their workplace/home/the scene of the proposed crime and sit there for hours staring menacingly at the building. Have you never seen Crimewatch? People will notice, lad. They may even note down your registration number in the hope of getting a cash reward from Crimestoppers.
When person A tells you to kill person B, otherwise person B will tell the police about the time you killed person C for person A, my advice is: kill person A. Faffing around with B is just time-wasting and piling up more corpses.
Wear gloves. Surely this is Assassin 101, really, otherwise you leave your juicy pawprints over every available surface. At least it’s not terribly likely that you’ll be shedding hairs over the crime scene, though, so a bonus point for the hairdo (or lack of).
Finally, if your target is Carla Connor, do not get within candlestick range. This really can’t be stressed too much. The best advice in this situation would be to go the Teresa Morton “special curry” route.
HOLBY CITY BEHIND THE SCREEN
pauseliveaction 