Strictly: Sweat, sequins and clichés

So, like panto and twice as camp, Strictly Come Dancing is back.

aleshaFirst off – I like Alesha Dixon. Decorative, yes, but I’ll forgive her for that since her comments were fine. So far, she’s doing well. This, however, merely served to highlight that the person that clearly should have been kicked off the panel was not Arlene Phillips, but cartoon-Italian Bruno Tonioli.

Buttock-clenchingly mangling the simile, he’s not big, funny or clever. In complete contrast to the sharp tongued and fabulous Craig Revel Horwood, for me the joy of the panel, and indeed the series.craig

The professional dancers are as admirable as ever. I can never remember who is gay, but it hardly matters. Wall-to-wall hard bodies, which is always something to admire whilst I’m *glued to my sofa snarfing crisps (*and no, not because of you Derren Brown. It’s some unidentifiable food substance I dropped between the cushions a few years ago) .

And as for the celebrity dancers, it’s early days. By which I mean, I can hardly remember anyone’s names yet, and usually don’t bother until half have been knocked out. Lynda Bellingham looked quite the Madam, and I mean that in a good way. I’m assuming Ricky Groves from East Enders is married, since he kissed his ring at the end of his dance with comely Erin Boag as if to say ‘I’m doing it for my career darling, I don’t fancy her really’.ricky_erin_index Really irritating, Ricky. Dancing is like acting. It’s all make-believe, or should be. Perhaps he’s been having unnerving dreams since rehearsals began, but dancing with a beautiful woman as if you’re holding a stink bomb under your nose is both unconvincing and frankly a little silly. Perhaps they should have given him a bloke for a partner instead.

posted by Inkface

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