(Series 9, ep.12) It’s not often that a Controversial New Initiative lasts for more than a week, but obviously the concept of Resilience has… resilience. It’s so resilient there’s even a Resilience Camp in the offing. Dynasty is desperate to go – well, you can’t blame her really. An entire get-away-from-it-all holiday revolving around simulated terrorist attacks and trying to climb over a small wooden wall? Brilliant!
The problem is that the Barrys are a bit strapped for cash now that Barry is no longer around to provide extra income by selling the teachers’ cars on internet auction sites. So Carol put on her best Humble Face (this is the one with less makeup) and went to see Christine, to ask if Dynasty could possibly go to Resilience Camp for free.
Her visit coincided with a crisis in the canteen, and Carol soon found herself donning the tabard of canteenly office and lining up alongside Maggie the Dinner Lady (who is now Maggie the Home Economics Teacher who thinks she’s way too good to dish out macaroni cheese from a serving hatch except in emergencies) and Connor, who’s just thrilled to have any excuse to go near a stove. You know how he loves a good flame.
Carol in a canteen was rather like Ronan Burley when he was shadowing Janeece in the school office – it was all basically just an excuse for some petty crime, including filling her bag with “square sausage” and Gabriella Wark’s purse.
Gabriella is still at Waterloo Road, waiting to receive the benefits that this caring, sharing seat of education can bestow on its pupils. This is good news for Verruca Salt, who has taken to wearing the Wark Family Tartan as a scarf, in honour of her new idol. Gabriella annoyed Carol by demanding to know if the custard was dairy free, on account of being lactose intolerant. “I’m brat intolerant,” said Carol, speaking for us all. It all ended in a food fight, which gave Carol the chance to scream at the kids for being so wasteful, which in turn impressed Maggie.
Sadly, Carol “can’t see her and potato peelings working out long term,” so she was soon in search of another position, at swanky-looking bar Valentino’s. The owner described himself as a “tactile man,” which manifested itself in him inappropriately squashing himself against Carol whenever the opportunity presented itself. George Windsor turned up at Valentino’s, and ended up thumping the tactile owner for being “appalling” with Carol.
Earlier on, George had pressed himself against Christine in a manner that was somewhat too “tactile,” and she’d told him where to go. Maybe he’d have more luck with Carol? By the time he got to Barry Towers clutching a lovely bunch of petrol station flowers, she’d already discovered the bailiffs had been and removed most of the furniture. Luckily bailiffs never take wine glasses, so at least George didn’t have to leave without having a drink first.
A few other bits of news to report. Nikki Boston is now engaged to Vix after going down on one knee in the Mariner’s Elbow, or whatever the local hostelry is called. “Will you be my civil partner?” said Nikki. “No, but I will be your wife,” Vix replied, having first ascertained that she will get to wear a posh frock.
Sue-Spark-I-mean-Mrs-Losely is apparently now the official Waterloo Road first aid expert on account of her extensive training as airline cabin crew. Unfortunately her first aid demo ended up with one of those tiresome mobile phone viral video scandal-type things, which was embarrassing for her and just a bit ridiculous for the rest of us.
And Christine has decided she must let Connor seek his own destiny in That London by taking up the job with the famous chef Cookie Crumbles. How quickly they grow!
Next time: A wild night out goes wrong for Imogen; Simon makes plans for Resilience Camp; and guess who’s back? (Clue: His first name and his second name are the same).