(Series 7, Ep.26) When you go for a job as a teacher at Waterloo Road they sit you in front of the interview panel with a cup of tea and a custard cream and they ask, “What do you know about boundaries and the pupil/teacher relationship?” If you shrug your shoulders, look blank and fill the ensuing awkward silence by dunking your biscuit in your tea – you’ve got the job. I swear that’s the only explanation for the entirely thick behaviour Jez Diamond displayed this week – has he not learned the lessons of Ms Montoya and Jonah, or Chris Mead and [insert name of just about any female pupil here]?
Guest Pupil of the Week was Mercedes, who runs as fast as the car that shares her name, at least over short distances. PE teacher and ex footballer Jez was thrilled to be able to mentor such a promising athlete, but it ended in tears when she twisted her ankle during a so-called “fun run” (those two words should never be found so close together in my opinion). Despite numerous WR pupils jogging past who could have summoned Tom Clarkson in his little red car, Jez decided the only thing for it was to help Mercedes limp back to her conveniently adjacent home. Where of course she pounced on him, and of course her brother came back and Drew Conclusions, and Jez got suspended. Mercedes is a nice girl and fessed up that she hadn’t really been molested by the Diamond geezer, but he has to stay suspended anyway, for being a daft chump. And Sian dumped him, too. Continue reading