Glee (9): I still have the use of my penis

This was another gloriously Terri-free episode, making me insanely optimistic that the writers have come to their senses and just quietly dropped the whole fake-pregnancy thing. Please, next time we see Terri, can she be filing for divorce on the grounds that Will is too good for her, and moving to Acapulco? Well, as Glee tells us, a girl can dream.

As can a boy with a very high voice. Kurt’s lifelong ambition to sing some crummily boring song from Wicked was nearly fulfilled, when he and Rachel battled it out with their high F’s. But Kurt blew the top note, and thus threw the audition, claiming it was so his dad wouldn’t have to live with the inevitable taunts. Er, hell-o? Kurt even breathes in a camp fashion. How would singing a showtune humiliate his macho dad any more than he is already, a million times a day? More likely Kurt suddenly realised what a rotten song it was, and decided not to embarrass his pa with such a shoddy musical choice.

The main theme this week was raising money for an Artie-friendly bus. Will insisted the club not only hold a bake-sale, but that the students spend a week in a wheelchair. All this was very well-handled; the many petty indignities faced by wheelchair users, the unthinking way disabled people’s opinions are assumed, rather than sought… I’m making it sound humourless but it wasn’t at all. It was rather moving, particularly Artie’s Dancing with myself. It would be a sour able-bodied meanie who didn’t enjoy the final dance – the entire Glee Club doing wheelies in their chairs, full of esprit de corps.

Twatbox: Michael Winner. The Emperor’s New Napkin

I was going to blog about Winner’s Dining Stars, but I found the whole programme, and particularly Michael Winner, to be so bloody annoying, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Where do we start with the man? Why I imagined this programme might provide light entertainment I cannot imagine. I can’t bring myself to even laugh at his preposterously over-inflated view of himself as an ‘expert’ on all things culinary. There are people whose opinions I will trust when it comes to food. Monica and Michel Roux Jr after seeing them on MasterChef for example. They know their stuff.

What does this odious, Mr Toad of a man know about anything? His career has included making terrible films and crass adverts. He seems to be very wealthy, which is all well and good, but hardly proves he had any talent for anything other than getting rich. He has failed to commit to any woman in his long life until now, after he’s had major heart surgery, which would not endear him to my heart one bit.

I don’t understand the premise behind Dining Stars or why anyone would be fool enough to invite this pompous ass into their house so that they can end up being thoroughly insulted in front of their family in really weirdly inappropriate cinema setting.

He ended up in tears facing a woman (about whom he’d been incredibly rude) who had lost ten stone but who had a child with learning disabilities and one with a serious heart condition. Her food (other than some brownies) was pretty average, but her story, and the warmth of the family, led to him crying, so he seemed to give her a pity ‘star’. Pitiful more like. I won’t be tuning in again.

Posted by Inkface

Brothers & Sisters: At times like this, a girl needs all the support she can get

I’ve just realised that I forgot to blog about last week’s Brothers & Sisters. Apologies for the tardiness, then, and if I’ve forgotten anything in the meantime…

It was a really sad episode, that much I do remember. Kitty couldn’t face another round of chemo, and had decided to “think” herself well again. Stocking up on superfoods, vitamins and willpower, she informed everyone that they had to support her and stay positive.

Naturally Nora was worried, and despatched Sarah to persuade her sister to reconsider and go back to conventional treatments. Meanwhile, Nora met yet another man who found her irresistible (must be something to do with the fact that she’s always in slightly fuzzy focus). This one had the triple advantages of being younger, having a motorbike and being an oncologist. He advised her to try and relax around Kitty (hello! This is Nora you’re talking to! Oh well, he’ll soon learn that Nora doesn’t do relaxing), and that Kitty needed to find her own way through her treatment.

Kitty spent ages getting all dressed up for a party. She wanted to look pretty, she said. And it was in the middle of the party that her hair started to fall out. There was a really touching scene where her mother and sister sat with her, hugging her and rearranging her hair to cover the bits of bare scalp, so she could leave the party without anyone noticing. And Robert gave her one of his proper Robert hugs (looking ever so slightly Goth, he was – Rob Lowe has been at the Grecian 2000 I think).

As Kitty shaved off her remaining hair, Nora and Sarah sat outside the bathroom talking about Nora’s new man and playing with wigs. Then Kitty appeared. “You have such a lovely head!” Nora told her, and they all had a group hug. Sniff.

Meanwhile, Rebecca discovered she’s pregnant. Justin had wondered about that, but then apologised for making assumptions and said the timing was all wrong for having a baby anyway. Which irritatingly means that Rebecca will now probably go and do something she’ll later regret. Of course it wouldn’t be B&S if the path wasn’t littered with life-altering misunderstandings.

Scotty’s dad came to visit. I’m really enjoying the fact that Scotty is getting much more screen time this series, and getting his own storylines. His dad arrived dressed as a comic book hero. Scotty’s mother had left him, he said, and you could see why. I thought to myself, aha – Scotty’s dad is also gay! He’s come to LA to come out! But no. He is having an affair with another woman, though.

Posted by PLA

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